Yin and Yang File for Divorce After Thousands of Years Together

Yin and Yang, one of the world’s most beloved and recognizable couples, have filed for divorce, citing irreconcilable differences as the reason for their split.

“It happens,” said the dark-haired Ms. Yin. “After thousands of years, couples just grow apart. I will always love Yang and his bright, active approach to life, but it is time for me to move on.”

According to a friend of the couple, the real surprise is that they did not separate sooner.

“You can only play that opposites-attract card for so long,” said the friend. “In truth, they had not really completed each other for centuries, and he was getting tired of living in her shadow. Besides, with their child well established on their own, there was no longer any practical reason to stay together.”

Despite their outward appearance of perfect balance, Yin and Yang’s relationship was often troubled by internal strain.

Where Yin is quiet and inward-looking, Yang is outspoken and energetic. Where Yin is content to stay home with a book and her cat, Yang prefers social gatherings. Where Yin sees the glass as half empty and shrinking, Yang sees it as half full and bursting with potential.

Even their temperature preferences clashed. Yin liked to keep their jaijitu so cool that Yang, a devoted beach enthusiast, often wore heavy robes indoors.

The world is very different from what it was when Yin and Yang first became soul mates.

Computers, the Industrial Revolution, indoor plumbing, streaming media — this venerable couple has seen it all.

“Honestly,” their friend laughed, “if online dating had existed back then, they probably would have found more compatible partners.”